How Not to Start a non-Blog

My sisters and soon to be brother-in-law have been BUGGING me for a very, very, very long time to start a blog. Their reason? "Oh, you're so far away and this way we can stay in touch. Phone calls are expensive, you know?" Yeah, right, expensive, for me!

Imagine this: The cell phone rings. Guitar intro - Iron Maiden's Wasted Years - starts playing. I picked up the phone. Did I answer? Nooooo, I could only try, because before my finger could even hit "answer", the ringing stops. The intro barely played two bars! On screen is the message, "1 Missed Call from _____ (fill in the blank with any of my sisters' names)." This is how it goes, almost always. They "miss-call" me and I call back. So yeah, phone calls are expensive - for me!

So here I am starting, or at least trying to, start a blog. But you know what? I don't blog! I really don't. This here, this is not a blog, but the rant of a raving lunatic whose ears are just about to fall off through years, yes, YEARS, of "gentle persuasions" to start what everyone call a "blog".

For the sake of my wallet, if not for my ears, I gritted my teeth and sat down to begin the arduous task. That was yesterday. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step, so says Confucius. Well, I say the journey to the nut house begins with a single click!

You know what's the most difficult thing about starting a blog? It's trying to name it, only to discover that the address has been taken. Taken! Taken!! "Sorry, this blog address is not available." Helloooo!! What in the world?! Alright, so the early bird catches the worm. Fine! I'll try again. After many hours - the sun was shining when I began - of trying, I finally managed to settle on so1itair3@blogspot.com. By the time "Choose a template" came on, it was dark outside.

The easiest thing about starting a blog? Choosing a template. There are millions of templates out there. How do you decide on what you like, which looks good or which one suits you? Well, you don't! You simply go to a page with various samples, close your eyes and click randomly. So, after a random click, I ended up with this one. Ta-da! "Your blog has been created!" Looks like I’m ready to begin.

What's next? Well, adding gadgets, customising layouts, select colours, and bla, bla, bla, (not necessarily in that order) followed by a short intro in "About Me" <-- not done yet, that's tedious work reserved for another day. Who wants to know about me anyway? I certainly don't. I already know all there is to know about myself and not keen to find out about anything else, short of a windfall coming my way, thank you very much.

After ALL THAT and one day later, here I am, ranting away. So welcome to my world! Whether I consistently update this blog or do it sporadically or not at all, I don't know. Cause I don't blog. Give me something to rant about and I just might "update".

*Ranting Ends*